Tag Archives: people

Vagabond

It is time to be moving on. Perhaps northeast this time. But I won’t go that way directly. I am bound for the coast highway, and then I will head north to Vancouver. From there I will meander east, to finally end up in Ontario.

By far the greatest pleasure in moving on is the road less traveled. Interstates are great for making time, for putting a lot of distance behind me. To really see the country, I have to get on the secondary highways, the “blue highways” on the old road maps. Now these roads are marked in red and don’t have the same mystique when studied in a hotel room, but they go to the same places, and mark much the same distance as many of the roads of old.

Some of these roads I have traveled in previous years, and I know the best roadside diners, the quieter rest stops, the detours to save miles and time. At other times I must feel my way around, and learn by trial and error the best places to stop.

All this takes a willingness to come back and try again, for there is never enough time to discover all the truly interesting places and people. That may not happen for years, and of course by then the best or the worst places might have closed. Familiar, friendly faces may have moved on. The investigative process will start all over again.

If I’m lucky, someone has told me about a town to visit, a restaurant to try, a new landscape to view. If it’s in my path, I’ll take a chance and ride through, eat and be a tourist again. New asphalt, new towns, new people all combine to make for an interesting sojourn into unknown territory.

But then the urge to move on will strike anew, and I’ll head off for a distant horizon, for a new day, for a brighter sunshine or a bluer sky.

One of the hardest parts of the vagabond life is knowing that I may never return, that I may never see new friends and acquaintances again.

The hardest part is never saying goodbye.

Paying dues

For most of us, our lives are wrapped up in family and friends to one degree or another. The closest friends we made were in our early school years, having shared the challenges of graduating to another year of public or high school, dating, getting a driver’s licence. If lucky, we kept some of those childhood friends into adulthood, for who else could possibly bring us down to our true size by re-telling an old, embarrassing story? If unlucky, we lost some of our closest friends, and thus a central part of our lives, for without good friends the best of times mean nothing.

We all grew up in a small, one-industry town. Although the prospects for local employment were good, most of my crowd wanted out. I led the way, into a high-risk occupation. Some of the others followed, and thus we started our various adventures.

I spent years traveling around North America and Africa, paid to do so by the company I worked for. For most of that time I lived out of suitcases in hotels and motels, and out of a duffel bag in tents from the arctic to the mountains, from the bush to the desert. It was a nomadic life, perfect for a young man who wanted to experience the world and its offerings.

There were women in every port, but none that could keep me interested for more than a while. Short-timers, I called them. Some were married, some weren’t. Some had family, some didn’t. On occasion I left a trail of emotional destruction in my wake – never intentional, but often disastrous for those left behind. Don’t get me wrong though – I did have some fabulous relationships with some wonderful women, although none lasted the test of absence or time.

As for my friends, well, they started killing themselves. Or rather, getting killed. Aircraft accidents, car crashes and motorcycle wrecks all took their toll. Even some of the friends I had made in adulthood were being decimated by the occupational hazards of our chosen work. When that started happening, I thought it time to move on to other, less hazardous, things.

Which, eventually, I did.

I had certainly led a charmed life until then. And there was a nagging feeling that I owed something for my good fortune. If only the good died young, then to be sure I was bound for hell, I thought.

I still have that feeling.

* * *

We never know when we will be called on to perform a small kindness or a hero’s mission — or something in between. The reward for doing so – if there can be a reward – is in knowing that perhaps dues were paid for past transgressions in life, and sometimes, love. A small comfort for those of us with many dues to pay.

A lonely road

I am leaving you today.

Yesterday I told you that I would be gone early in the morning, but I cannot. How could I not see you one last time?

Your arms are outstretched for a hug, but I cannot, for it would be too hard. I wonder if you understand why.

I have knelt by your bed and held your hand and told you stories of time spent in the deserts of Africa. I was your age then, but unlike you, footloose and irresponsible. Some would say I have not changed.

I relived for you each night’s starry southern cross, the white sand of the ocean shore going on for miles and miles against the background of blue seascape, how the sharks were drawn to the sound of the helicopter’s beating blades.

I have read to you to while away the endless hours when you were awake.

I watched as you closed your eyes, and listened.

I watched as you closed your eyes, and slept.

I wonder if you will remember.

I know I will.

*  *   *   *

It is not a long ride home, as rides go, but it has been lonely. I am comforted by the knowledge that Teresa’s daughter, family and friends remain behind to help her through the nights and days to come.

Time

May 10 – May 17, 2000

Time is measured in seconds. Minutes. Hours. Days.

Time is the blink of an eye.

Time is what it takes for the pain to go away after an injection.

Time is what is spent zoning in and out of consciousness.

Time is the split second of faint recognition, and the weak smile that follows.

A hand held.

Throat soothed with water.

Parched lips balmed.

Hair combed and then brushed.

Teeth cleaned.

Time heals.

I watch her get better, minute by agonizing minute, hour by hour, day by endless day. It is not easy for me to see such pain. I think to myself that I would trade places if I could, but in my heart I know that is a lie, for I could never suffer such pain.

And through it all, she smiles. Not for long. Not easily. But she smiles.

My heart melts.

Time changes some things forever.

Riding partner

I met her in a motorcycle shop in the high desert, where she worked behind the parts counter. I noticed her because she wore overalls. Yes, I know. There’s nothing special about overalls. So sue me.

We got to talking while she was cleaning up the wall display at the back of the shop. I was bored, and since she could carry on a conversation, she was interesting. Once the ice was broken I discovered that she had a ready smile, and blue eyes that sparkled when she smiled.

She rode a brand-new pearl-white Sporty with a solo seat that had barely a thousand miles on it. I teased her about that, and learned that she had no one to ride with as often as she’d like. She was new to the area, and didn’t have many friends that rode.

No problem.

On the 4th we took a ride out the 10 to Beaumont, then north through Cherry Valley. She was amazed at the change as we rode up the mountain. It was so different from the desert where she had moved to only months before. There was plenty of green grass, pine trees, cedars — all under a clear blue mountain sky.

We stopped often, and at Big Bear we had lunch at a small family-run restaurant. I teased her into letting me take her picture with the lake surrounded by pine trees and the snow-capped mountain peaks in the background.

On the way back she couldn’t stop talking about how beautiful the ride had been, so of course I had to ask her if she’d like to go on another. The answer was yes. Monday at noon we would meet up and go.

On the weekend, I rode in to Marina del Rey. Late Sunday, on my return, I learned that Teresa had been hit by a car turning left in front of her while she rode to work that morning.

Truck stop

April 2000

There’s a restaurant/truck stop in the vast nothingness that is Saskatchewan that has become a regular haunt of mine. Well, regular in the sense that I always stop there when passing through. Why? Because of the butterfly sausages, hash browns and eggs over, of course. Day or night, rain or shine, they’re always the same. There’s something to be said for such consistency in this day and age, don’t you think? Particularly at a roadhouse where the cooks are moving through faster than the trucks.

I’ve not been through here in the last eighteen months or so, but there is one other constant, besides the food, and that is Mel, the waitress. The first time I showed up and sat down, Mel came over to ask the usual questions: where are you headed? where are you from? how long have you been on the road? are you coming back this way?

Over the years I have become a regular, and we have entered into an easy banter about nutty cage drivers, speed traps, truckers (of which there are many that stop here) and motorcycles. She wants to own one some day. Not a Harley of course — too expensive. Rather, something foreign and more affordable.

This time, however, I am in my car. Mel hasn’t recognized me, perhaps because of the length of time since my last stop, but more probably because I’ve arrived by car, and I am sans beard. This has allowed me a great opportunity to pay more attention to the eat-in crowd.

The foursome at the table in front of me consist of two women with their backs to me, and two men facing, one older, the younger on the outside of the booth. The men wear baseball caps with truck logos on them. The younger one wears cowboy boots. Okay, he wears at least one cowboy boot, since I can only see the right foot from where I am sitting. The boot is well-worn and muddy, and has a leather boot strap for half of a set of spurs.

Talk of favorite country and western singers and songs floats across the table. Johnny Cash is mentioned. The titles of trucker movies prevail, although I don’t recognize any of them.

My meal arrives, transported by Mel. She hurries off to wait tables. I must have arrived just before the truck-stop late-dinner rush. I eat in a silence broken by random bits of conversation that echo around the diner.

It is dark and very late, and I am in a hurry to get back on the road. I walk past the four people at the table in front of me, pay my bill and walk out to my car.

I forgot to look for that other spur.