*** SPOILER ALERT ***

Matt Damon Some guy, wounded and adrift at sea, is picked up by a pearl diver fishing boat, stitched up and brought back to life. There was no secret microchip projector under the floater’s skin. Sensing there is no money to be had, the rescuers decide to drop Matt off at the local American army recruiting station. Typical of the operational style of the American military, nay, American tourists around the world in general, no one speaks the local lingo.

Fortunately for the aforementioned sailor, someone in the Army does speak English.  And thus, Nicolas Cage is forever doomed to perdition.

Much Jiu Jitsu ensues as the Alien Predator something chases down everyone in the jungle wheat field.

It’s the comet, silly.

** Unlike African Kung-Fu Nazis, I didn’t watch all of this, so I could be wrong. To be truthful, I didn’t watch all of African Kung-Fu Nazis, either, so byte me.

*** SPOILER ALERT ***

Trump Adolph boards his submarine and makes for Ghana. Or something. Kung-fu hilarity ensues. The white-face blacks are a nice touch. Not recommended, but watched solely for the amusement factor. I guess.

Hang me now.

*** SPOILER ALERT ***

Two of the stupidest people on the face of the earth (shared with approximately 70 million Americans, but I digress) cross paths with a prepper. The duo talk the young lady into believing that the end of the world is going down – now. Convinced that there is no way anyone could possibly take them seriously, the stupids chase after Miss Doomsday, smoke a doobie, and come to the sudden realization that she believes them.

Hilarity ensues.

I’ve watched this short series twice. I enjoyed it even more the second time.

Those of you who have difficulty comprehending spoken English should be aware that there are no subtitles.