DIY Thesis theme sucks problems

R.I.P Thesis 2.0. Too Bad, not so sad at all. Buy another theme.
R.I.P Thesis 2.0. Too Bad, but not so sad at all. Buy another theme.

Update February 7, 2019: Jesus Christ, but the man has the nerve to re-sell his theme to people who have already bought it (who have already paid and paid and paid in more ways than one) AGAIN? Oh, wait, it’s an all-new, goody-goody, best evar, search engine dream! Loads faster. Looks better. Links easier. Does more. Grows hair back. Gets better mileage. Works harder. Lasts longer (until the next feature is added and you pay more).

Oh, and by the way: It’s going to be a hun a year. Most likely a “sale price” until the next year, when it will go up with a super-duper price increase because that’s how he works. Pay and pay and pay and still the fucking theme is a loser. Sad.

W.T.F. is with that?

Update June 19, 2018: O.M.G. Social media profile boxes now available. How many years has it been, exactly?

Update May 9, 2018: Bwaaaaahahahaha. It has occurred to me that one of my commenters may be a shill for the theme that has no name. Nice try though, losers. My own page STILL gets pretty good results, and that pleases me bigly. What really pleases me even more bigly is that the fake domain was re-registered in January of this year. Go fish.

Update April 13, 2016: DIY Thesis is out with yet another announcement of a skin for the Thesis 2.0 theme. Jesus Christ, but it’s been how many years since Thesis 2.0 had been out and they’re only announcing really purty, priddy fine, high impact theme design? Good lord, people, BUY ANOTHER THEME, please.

If you can’t afford one, there are P L E N T Y of themes for free that will do everything you need, many times over, in a clear and concise way. You won’t have to wrestle with NO REFUNDS, EVAR, or the sad spectacle of having a theme that you need to pay a developer to use. BUY ANOTHER THEME.

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Update June 1, 2015:  In other words, another DIYtheme clusterfuck. Nothing new to see here, folks. Move along now, and BUY ANOTHER THEME.

Effectus Skin webinar didn’t go as smoothly as we had hoped. Hundreds of people were denied access, and on top of that, our recording failed, too.

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UPDATE May 28, 2015: According to the great Chris Pearson of Thesis DIY themes fame, “Google has been using site performance as a rankings signal since February of 2010”.

If that’s the case, why has he now, only five years later, come up with a Thesis DIYthemes skin, to take advantage of Google site performance rankings? What, exactly, has he been doing with DIYthemes for the past five years? Why is he only now recognizing that performance rankings are a huge part of Google search results if, five years ago, Google was using performance rankings?

According to Chris Pearson of DIYthemes, “we’ve created the new [ skin ], which brings you a customizable responsive design”. Really? What took you so long? Oh, right, nothing to see here. Move along, everyone. It always takes him years and years to do shit. (See below if you don’t believe that.)

AND ALWAYS REMEMBER THIS, PEOPLE:

If you’re thinking about purchasing the Thesis DIY theme, think again. Need I say more in reference to the Twitter Twatting Chris Pearson and his DIY Thesis Theme:

“we do not … offer refunds after a purchase has been made.”

In other words, if you’re looking for a refund after handing over your hard-earned cash, you more than likely won’t get one.

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UPDATE April 30, 2015: Here ya go. But before you upgrade, don’t bother. Thesis 1 theme is not responsive. Don’t waste your money on this dog, because search engines will ignore your site for the most part and your ratings will completely tumble.

The latest greatest update to Thesis 1 is out, and the great master, Chris Pearson himself, has this to say in the comments:

Upgrading a Thesis 1 site to Thesis 2 generally requires a professional

WTF is with that?

Don’t buy this time suck, people. It’s a real drag on your output and your bank account before you get anything that’s useable. And like I said, if it’s Thesis 1, your search rankings will tumble because the theme is not responsive.

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If you’re thinking about purchasing the Thesis DIY theme, think again. Need I say more in reference to the Twitter Twatting Chris Pearson and his DIY Thesis Theme:

“we do not … offer refunds after a purchase has been made.”

In other words, if you’re looking for a refund after handing over your hard-earned cash, you more than likely won’t get one.

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How to ESCAPE ANY THESIS DIY THEME and its Twitter Twatting owner:

  1. Install a free WordPress theme of your choosing, or use one already in your Appearance tab. If you’d like to try a FREE, AMAZINGLY CUSTOMIZABLE theme from menus, try Acquoid Themes and its free Suffusion theme. It’s had over a million downloads for a reason.
  2. In your new theme, install a plugin called All in One SEO. This will optimize your blog for search engine optimization once you escape the Thesis Theme and its completely useless and irrelevant time-sucking learning curve.
  3. In your new theme, install the All in One SEO Pack Importer plugin.
  4. Activate the All in One SEO Pack Importer plugin under Settings/AIOSEOP in the sidebar and put it to work. Once done, you can deactivate the SEO Importer plugin.
  5. Enjoy the benefits of your escape from the Twitter Twat.
  6. Don’t forget to activate the All in One SEO plugin. Once you do, you’re good to go with all the search engine capabilities of your former Thesis theme stupidity. Furthermore, you shouldn’t lose any search engine visibility.

Once Thesis is gone and you’ve freed yourself from its infinite stupidity, consider taking a look at Aquoid Themes. Their Suffusion theme is free, infinitely customizable from menus, and does all that DIY Thesis and its Twitter Twat author promises – All for free!

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Update November 16, 2013: Well now. It would seem that the DIY Thesis Theme refund policy has been changed to the following:

According to the refund policy, I can’t get one.

<snip>

the Thesis Theme refund policy states that “only if you have worked with our support staff to try and resolve the problem first.

Very interesting. It would appear that they’ve been getting a lot of requests for refunds and that’s one way to keep new customers paying through the nose.

Stay away from this theme, people. It’s nothing but a headache, in my opinion.

I have now successfully completed the move of five of my six sites over to free WordPress themes with no loss of SEO, data, or comments. Thank goodness for WordPress plugins that allowed me to do that.

[Edited to add that ALL of my themes have now been freed from the captivity of Thesis DIY and Chris Pearson.]

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Update August 10, 2013: I no longer recommend Chris Pearson’s time-sucking DIY Thesis or DIY Thesis 2 theme in any way, shape, or form. Avoid it at all costs. I have returned three four five all six of my sites to the WordPress default themes, with the same functionality, and I’m not looking back.

No matter what bullshit Chris Pearson attempts to sell you on DIY Thesis themes, don’t buy it. It sucks. And further to that, it won’t convert from Thesis 1 to Thesis 2. DON’T BUY INTO THE BULLSHIT. You’ll be sorry if you do.

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Update July 1, 2013: It’s now been nine, count’em, nine months. If this asshole was pregnant, he’d have a baby by now, and a manual by Dr. Spock on how to set everything up. What’s the dealio here with Thesis and DIY? Who the hell knows? Rumor has it that the latest beta release of his theme isn’t compatible with thesis 2.0. You have to DO IT OVER AGAIN! Apparently, it’s another new concept brought to the people that have financed his millionaire lifestyle. Go figure.

Update June 11, 2013: I’ve lost count of how many months it’s been since the promises were made. Hold your nose, because they’re all worthless and stink like shit. Nothing new here. Move on to BUY ANOTHER THEME! Unless, of course, you’re independently wealthy, don’t serve your customers needs, and continue to fuck the shit out of them by not providing goods for money spent on this completely incomprehensible DIY Thesis theme. Customer service? What’s that?

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This dumbass dipshit brags about having sold over 53,000 theme packages. That’s around four million bucks+. No wonder the son of a bitch spends all his time being a Twitter twat rather than serving his paying customers. What a dipshit.

From the Thesis blog, December 7, 2012: Christmas is right around the corner, and here at DIYthemes, we’re busy filling our sleigh with Boxes, Skins, and everything else you need to run a killer website.

Fucking A! It’s now May 13, 2013. Just where are all of those “Boxes, Skins, and everything else you need to run a killer website”. Losers.

Update May 8, 2013: No promised skins. No official manuals. Seven months later? It sucks to be a Thesis user.

R.I.P. Thesis themes. Long live a wiser, more functional choice backed up by its authors with manuals, skins and a user forum that speaks English anyone can understand. Business schools should take and teach a lesson from this outfit on how not to do customer relations. As of January 9 there are still no Thesis 2 manuals provided by the theme author. There are still no skins as promised on the sales page. Ho-hum. Just another Thesis failing.

BUY ANOTHER THEME!

Update March 1, 2013: FIVE MONTHS AND STILL NO SKINS OR OFFICIAL MANUAL. The bilious stench of a dead theme is everywhere.

And that’s not just my opinion.

BUY ANOTHER THEME!

Update February 1, 2013: Four months and still no skins, nada, rien, nothing. The bad joke is on people who spent good money – such as myself – on a worthless piece of shit.

BUY ANOTHER THEME!

Update January 7, 2013: I’m thinking that the Great One™ hasn’t yet figured out that independent theme designers aren’t flocking to his Thesis 2 theme to build skins for sale. He must have really pissed off a lot of people in the WP industry.

BUY ANOTHER THEME!

Update January 1, 2013: Three months, and still no manual, still no skins. Give the Thesis theme a wide berth, people.

The latest Twitter Twat reveals that the reason the skins weren’t released was because Chris Pearson, Twitter Twit extraordinaire, didn’t want to piggyback onto the Newtown shootings. Really? WTF is with that? And then came Christmas, and New Year’s, and next it will be Valentine’s Day. Oh, wait. Now it’s because he’s consulting with lawyers. Puh-leeze. Give us all a break.

BUY ANOTHER THEME!

December 21, 2012: Still no manual, still no skins.

Some poor guy has been in the Thesis 2 forum trying to find out how to put an image rotator in the header since December 13. He hasn’t had an answer that makes any sense since then. I’m trying to do the same thing, and I come up with a blank too. When I posted my displeasure by saying that the answers to his questions didn’t make any sense, my post was deleted. Another has been trying since December 1, with no success from the people who have all the answers – whoever they are.

What a bunch of fucking morons.

BUY ANOTHER THEME!

December 5, 2012 – still no manual or any other promised goods. But, according to the corporate flim-flammer, Thesis 2 is completely compatible with WP3.5. Go figure. Vaporware was never this bad.

  • Customer service: Zero.
  • Customer feedback: Zero.
  • Contact with company representatives: Zero.
  • Public relations: Zero.
  • Getting what the customer pays for and is promised: Zero.
  • The chance that I would I recommend this company, its products, its management team or its owner: ZERO.

BUY ANOTHER THEME!

Update December 1, 2012: No manual, no skins. It’s been two, count ’em, two months. Where’s the beef? What a fucking loser this theme company is.

BUY ANOTHER THEME!

The saddest thing by far is that this dumbass clown and his Thesis 2 theme has a public relations disaster nightmare on his hands and he’s too smart by far to recognize it. If he was just a tad more of a dumbass, he’d be trying to do damage control. He can’t, though, because he spends too much time being a Twitter Twat™.

Forum user counts have been disabled, but queries are way down compared to just a few days ago. I guess everyone is finally learning how to use Thesis 2 all by themselves.

* cue sound of uncontrollable laughter *

BUY ANOTHER THEME!

Update November 15, 2012: I’ve spent innumerable hours trying to do the simplest things with this theme, such as have teasers with thumbnails, captions under images, and a whole lot more. THIS THEME IS UNUSABLE IN ITS PRESENT STATE. Which means, it’s unusable if you want to do basic WP functions that are embedded in WP. BUY ANOTHER THEME!

Furthermore, who gives a flying fuck about Golden Width Typography or whatever the fuck he calls it when you can’t even design a fucking homepage with this fucking useless monstrosity that he’s been paid millions of dollars for?

Update November 5, 2012: Apparently a Thesis DIY Themes employee has a paid theme available for sale. Why is it that an employee has time to develop a skin for sale, yet the clusterfuck known as Pearson&Cie can’t smell their own shit well enough to produce a skin? Is that a method of rewarding employees, rather than loyal theme subscribers? WTF is with that?

Clown & Company can’t even get a favicon image to display. Christ on mighty. Oops. I mean, they’ll be a-gettin’ to that Real.Soon.Now.

Rotating header images? Nope. Sorry about that. Want to search the forum only for T2 rotating header image info? Can’t do that either. All the shit and detritus for T1 comes up, and there’s no way to tell until you actually read the forum post whether it applies to T1 or T2. BUY ANOTHER THEME!

Update November 1, 2012: It’s been a month since Thesis 2 was unceremoniously dropped on its paying customers, and still no manual. Still no skins. But they’re coming Real.Soon.Now. Funny thing about that, though. Real Soon Now was the cri de couer of software in the ’90s. Usually it meant that nothing was ever forthcoming.

WTF is with that? Vaporware or what? I’m beginning to think the Thesis theme is done.

My recommendation: BUY ANOTHER THEME!

Update October 24, 2012: The Thesis 2.01 update will not have official documentation. Nothing new there. The Thesis 2.0 release still has no documentation provided by Pearson. If it smells like shit, it is shit.

Try to imagine a business that promotes itself exclusively by tweeting on twitter, and you have the essence of diythemes and its product. Meanwhile, the Thesis theme forum goes unused in an effort to have it and its moderators feebly attempt to hold the hands of the owners of a product for which no official documentation exists. If it smells like shit, it is shit.

Oh, wait. I said that already. BUY ANOTHER THEME!

Update October 15, 2012: Thesis 2 was dropped unceremoniously onto Thesis aficionados minus a manual, minus how-tos, minus just about everything a good piece of software should have. The fanboys all love it and extoll the virtues, but it’s no miracle cure for anything. And it won’t be.

  • Drag and drop? Not likely.
  • Blockquotes, a staple of WP since forever? Not recognized.
  • No coding required? Sure, I guess. Somewhere.
  • A thumbnail image standard in WP? Not recognized.
  • Teasers? Go code.
  • Rounded corners? Where?
  • wp_debug codes?  Ad infinitum.
  • Skins? Not available. But they’ll be there real soon now–just like the documentation.
  • It makes extensive modifications to the database. Ouch.

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I can no longer recommend Chris Pearson’s Thesis or Thesis 2 theme in any way, shape, or form. It is my considered opinion that the Thesis theme should be avoided it at all costs. Please consider Genesis or some other paid theme platform for WordPress.

My advice: Try something else if you’re looking for a paid theme.