* * * SPOILER ALERT * * *

CITIZENS: It’s the karate kids.

SHERIFF BRODY of the immaculate hair: I’ll get right on that.

COUNCILLORS: It’s not a shark!

SHERIFF BRODY otih: It’s sharks. They’re everywhere.

COUNCILLORS: It’s not a shark!

SHERIFF BRODY: Thinks his wife is a shark.

SHERIFF BRODY’S HARPY WIFE: Does my ass look fat in this bathing suit?

SHERIFF BRODY: Rules. And camel toe.

QUINN THE ESKIMO: Sharks!

THE SHARK GUY: It’s a shark!

SHERIFF BRODY: It’s not a shark.

THE SHARK GUY: Bite radius.

COUNCILLORS: It’s a fish.

WOMAN IN BLACK: It’s all SHERIFF BRODY’s fault.

THE SHARK GUY: Red or white. What will it be?

SHERIFF BRODY: Does my wife’s ass look fat in that bathing shit?

THE SHARK GUY: Camel toe. Let’s cut the not-the-shark open. The shark ate the boat.

EVERYONE: Shark!

QUINN THE ESKIMO: Let us have another drink.

NRA: The only thing that stops a big bad fish is a good NRA man with a gun.