Miss Universe was deployed to the the sunny beaches of Gitmo. No word on whether she was able to take a look at or participate in a good and well-deserved waterboarding. Perhaps she was able to dry and curl her hair with an electroshock treatment after a nice, relaxing swim.

We also met the Military dogs…

No you didn’t, or your ass would be grass — Gitmo grass, bitch.

We visited the Detainees camps and we saw the jails, where they shower, how the recreate themselves with movies, classes of art, books.

Who were the rocket scientists who sent this woman to a prison camp to which most of the detainees have been rendered, tortured and otherwise refused any rights whatsoever under international law, not to mention U.S. law? America sent children to this hell-hole.

Oh, right. Miss Universe is an NBC Universal, Inc. and Donald J. Trump Partnership, and it was a USO tour. They should have resurrected Bob Hope, á la Weekend at Bernie’s. He probably would have received better press.

Thanks to the New York Times for the story, who tried to make light of the fools’ parade by bringing a new American-invented boogey-man — Hugo Chavez and Venezuala — into the picture. Fortunately, and unbeknownst to the NYT, the unintended satire in their article speaks for itself.