Dear Neil Young: Please join John Kerry in being a dolt.

(Updated below the asterisk)

Hiroshima, Neil? Really? Hiroshima in Canada?

Even though Neil Young is Canadian, I think he’s been spending far too much time associating with our American cousins.

In Hiroshima, total casualties were around 150,000. Throw in Nagasaki, because I can, and that poor city ended up with around 75,000 casualties. I didn’t even have to look that up. But I’ll bet good money that Neil doesn’t know what he doesn’t know.

In other words, Neil Young, go fuck yourself and keep burning that Middle Eastern oil you’re so fond of. That’s the Middle Eastern oil converted to fuel the airplane* you used to get your old, tired musician’s wrinkled ass to Fort McMurray, Neil.

Incidentally, Neil, those “national farmers” you’re so fond of are most likely owned by conglomerates burning Middle Eastern oil in the tractors and harvesters. That’s the oil used to fund the Middle Eastern butchery that goes on every day. You know, the Middle East that thinks America should solve all its problems every time it has one? That Middle East.

How’s that working out so far, Neil? Do you even have an idea?

* I apologize profusely. Mr. Young drove from San Francisco in some monstrosity called a LincVolt powered by electricity and Ethanol. Obviously, Mr. Young has far too much time on his hands. Perhaps he wasn’t aware that, in his absence, Canada has remained a backwater, lacking electric-car plugins, gasoline refined from corn (we all know how that’s going), and it still has WW2-Hiroshima-sized atomic bombs going off everywhere.

I’m excited that the United States of America and its citizens have finally taken notice of Canada. Thankfully, because of those Hiroshima-sized nuclear explosions going off everywhere oil happens to be present, building a fence at the border won’t be necessary to keep them out.

God Save the Queen.

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