Any damn fool can beg up some kind of job; it takes a wise man to make it without working. – Charles Bukowski
*** spoiler alert ***
Great campy fun, but but but where’s the cameo by the originals? Sadly, missing.
Thanks be to the gods of birthright that allowed Ted Cruz to migrate to the United States of America while deserting his socialist homeland. ‘Tis a grand homecoming, to be certain. Here’s hoping he’s defeated in his attempt to win the Republican nomination by another fascist blowhard, the perennially bankrupt Trumpinator.
I can’t wait.
Blunderbusses at 10 paces, anyone?
I know, he did have a silly grin on his face, but the maniacal laughter at the end – well, you know.
* With no disrespect meant to Wendy’s, registered owner of the Baconator trademark.
I’ve been watching the KTLA online feed of the North fire. The fire crossed the 15 near the Cajon Pass and is traveling unhindered on its way. The wind funnels up the pass and drops down onto the flat. I don’t think it will bode well for any homes in its path.
In another life well-lived, I spent 4,000 hours of helicopter flight time on forest fires in northern Canada. A lot of it came back to me in a huge rush while watching the feed. I had to load a mapping program to follow the progress of the news helicopters as they patrolled the perimeter with eyes high in the sky. The resolution of the camera from 8,500 feet is phenomenal.
There were no DC-10 airtankers back in the old days.
But I digress.
I couldn’t resist centering the map over a former favorite watering hole.
The usual suspects were in Fontana at a biker rally. One p.m. (that’s right, one in the afternoon) came and went, and, being the irresponsible, thirsty louts we were, we saddled up and headed for the 10. At the 215 we turned south and pulled off at La Cadena. For the uninitiated, it’s the home of the Club 215, a peeler bar renowned for nothing in particular but for being two stories high, with a balcony.
It was also on the way home, if you took the slight detour I outlined.
We liked the place because we could get out in the fresh air, wander around, and watch the sights – of which there aren’t many in Coulton. The girls liked it, too. Since we were the only ones in the club at that early hour, they wandered in and out to chat. I won’t go into details, but by early evening, it was long past time to herd the lads home.
I knew that, because beer bottles began floating down from the second story balcony to explode in the parking lot. Seeing as I was the only illegal in the club (I checked – there were no Canadian girls performing), and being of sound mind, I made an informed decision.
It was time to roll.
With the able assistance of a couple of the ladies, we managed to get the boys down the stairs without anyone falling down. Out in the parking lot, it was an entirely different story.
Tommy threw a leg over his Sporty, collapsed the kickstand, put both feet on the pegs, and headed on his way, eager to be in the wind. The problem was, he hadn’t bothered to light the fire. He promptly fell over with both feet on the pegs while still gripping the bars.
Much laughter ensued.
Eventually, we managed to get Tommy untangled and out from under his Sporty. We made sure to keep him on the bike as we helped him up. Once we got him straight and level, I started the engine, put it in gear, and slapped him on the back.
Away he wobbled.
It was a simple matter to head south on the 215, hit the 60 at Box Springs, and meander on down the road on the 10 to the 62 turnoff. I got to ride sweep to clean up the debris on the way home.
It was an uneventful ride on a normal California day under sunshine and blue sky.
I miss it sometimes, but not often, now.
The tanner used to be a lot better.
*** SPOILER ALERT ***
Wrong-way Corrigan The Magic Hand heads out because 72 virgins and because steering wheel. She gets chased because too many steering wheels and ends up doing a 180. Because Santa’s air guitar. Things explode. Water. Because sand.
Also: Bolt cutters.
Tejas will finally be forced to become a state of the union. Unfortunately, that isn’t saying much for the State of the Union.
Oh, and Dahboo777: What the fuck is wrong with you? Was Dahboo666 taken? If so, by whom?
Remember the Alamo, Davy.